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Are you and your partner compatible but have no sexual chemistry? If you are struggling with this issue, you are not alone. My experience is that all great relationships have both chemistry and compatibility. 1. If you feel this is a problem, it is. Ignoring it makes it worse. This problem does not go away, not matter what excuses you make or how much you want it to disappear. Actually, over time, it gets worse. 2. You are not being selfish to want both - you deserve it. Ask yourself: Do I deserve to have both a best friend and a lover? And mostly, do you deserve love? 3. You cannot talk yourself into chemistry or compatibility. There is only one thing sadder than two people who have good sexual chemistry yet can't seem to be good friends, and that is best friends who just don't have that sexual chemistry. Oftentimes, best friends stay together and deny their sexual nature; resentment usually builds over time. "Trying" to feel chemistry is impossible - either it is there or it is not. 4. When you have both, the relationship grows in a healthy way. All healthy relationships have both chemistry and friendship; this is what allows the partnership to grow and flourish. The only way to make-up is with friendship and chemistry. Chemistry draws us back to other person even when we are angry and friendship makes us glad we got over our differences. And this is the cycle - and both are needed to complete the circle.
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