Does Your Teenage Daughter Have Mood Swings?

If you have never experienced a teenage girl’s mood swing consider yourself fortunate. I have lived through many a mood swing puzzled as to what just happened.

It’s amazing how you can be enjoying a soda together, talking and laughing and all of a sudden this alien takes over your daughter’s body. She screams, she yells and she storms out of the room, leaving you with two soda cans and a cloud of dust.

I can offer some suggestions on coping with these mood swings:

1. Don’t take it personally. I know it’s tough to not take it personally when you were just screamed at, however what I’ve often found is the underlying hostility is toward something that happened earlier in the day, or even three days ago.

2. Don’t respond. What I’ve found is that you can not talk calmly or rationally to an irrational teenage girl. Any response will only cause additional anger and yelling.

3. When times are calm, make sure your daughter knows that you’re always there for her to talk to and that you do understand that some days can be tough. Encourage her to share with you what’s going on.

4. If you do end up reacting, as soon as you catch yourself, walk away. Let your daughter know that YOU need a ten minute time out. Use those precious minutes to recompose yourself and gain control again.

5. If you really believe that your daughter’s behavior is not in sync with other girls, have her tested. My own daughter has ADD and this was an added component to her mood swings.

6. Talk to other moms to determine what typical teenage girl behavior is and what might fall outside of that “typical” box.

7. Stay involved. Know your daughter’s friends and know what they are doing. Peer pressure is unreal for teenage girls.

While these tips won’t stop your teen’s mood swings, I hope they will help you keep a cool head.

Audrey Okaneko is mom to two girls. She can be reached at audreyoka@cox.net or visited at www.todays-parent.com

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