Remember Where It All Began - National Birthmother's Day May 12th!

The landmark day you became parents¡­. It's pretty clear that the day of your
adoption was not like any other day. It's the day you became a mother, your
husband became a father and your parents became grandparents. Your life is
forever changed and no other event will ever encompass all you have gone
through to get to this day.

There is also someone else who is a very important person; someone with
deep feelings of loss and sadness. That special person is your child's birth
mother, who has gone through a great ordeal to bring you this day. Without
her none of you would have come together. All members of the triad will
remember this day vividly and with deep emotion.

Sadly, it is sometimes necessary to point out and remind adoptive parents, or
parents waiting for that moment, that these children find their adoptive parents
after a long and often difficult journey suffered by their birth mothers. We must
never forget this very important individual who, by strength of character, or
difficulty in circumstances, or both, opted to give the gift of a child to those who
could not have one. For this reason alone they deserve respect, recognition,
consideration, thoughtfulness and kindness, from those who benefit from their
decision.

Letters and pictures, at the very least, are not much to ask and often provide
your birth mother with hope and encouragement about the decision she
made. When she sees a happy and healthy picture of her birth child, she has
confirmation that her decision was the right one. The occasional visit, if agreed
upon and handled wisely, can help to balance out the lives of each person
involved: the birth mother, the child and the adoptive family, and honor the
wishes of the person who gave them so very much.

Should you doubt these truths, seek out some stories on open adoption, speak
to someone who is a birthparent, or ask your adoption professional for some
references to reinforce your decision to choose open adoption. Then, honor
your birth mother's wishes, always.

You are your child's parents, no doubt. But a birth mother never forgets the
birth of their child. Even if this child is out of their sight he/she will never be
truly be gone from her memory. They were your child's first mother and
because of this, this child will always remain in their memories and in their
hearts.

Please, take the time to send pictures regularly or when requested. Whatever
your agreement is with the birth mother, commit to it and follow through as
promised. If you need any incentive, simply look into your child's eyes and
remember where this started!

Article Source: http://www.wahm-articles.com

Mardie Caldwell, C.O.A.P. is a speaker and award-winning author of two books, Adopting Online and Adoption: Your Step-by-Step Guide. Mardie is also the talk show host of Let's Talk Adoption.com with Mardie Caldwell. For more information email Mardie Caldwell

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